150528

"It's about who you miss at 2 in the afternoon when you're busy, not 2 in the morning when you're lonely."

I DON'T MISS YOU ANYMORE. or maybe not.
REPLACING THE FEELING OF SADNESS BECAUSE OF YOUR ABSENCE INTO INTENSE HATRED.  
xo, readysetdrool.

150419

You do so much for a person (not that you're expecting something in return ) but what you get is that you are being indirectly pushed away. All. The. Time. You call them cowards without the balls. These are the kind of bags you never wish to own. The one that starts with douche. I hope nobody treats you like this. 

120722

If I could tell you about what I've been feeling lately in a word, it would be the word... sad. Sad because I'm literally alone, these days. I refuse to reach out to whoever made me this stiff because I don't want to feel rejected again. Maybe it's a little bit fine if it stays like this for a while. At least I don't get judged again. Sometimes people cannot differentiate insults and jokes. :l

xo, readysetdrool.

Illegal Paem

Hello there!
I've been pretty jobless for about 2 weeks now and since I haven't really started my nursing career yet, I've decided to become a total professional bummer for a while. Hence, I present thee the, the goofballs I spend most of my time with these past few weeks.... and the /illegal/ things we've done.

Now, why illegal? Simple. These kids wants to get kicked out and feed their cravings rather than getting themselves rot inside the academy whilst waiting for their end dates to come, since they're serving their penalties -- can't go out from the academy. 그냥 그냥 그냥..... 

 떡볶이 cravings satisfied. ALL THE TIME.

thoughts

How we got into this mad situation, only doing things out of frustration

Trying to make it work, but, man, these times are hard - For the First Time, The Script

Finally

After 4 long years full of rants, laugh-tears, agony, heartaches and mostly happy times, I earned my Professional Nursing Pin. For me, this small pin is a reminder to myself that no matter how hard nursing school was, I totally pwned it. With a total of about 24 case studies, more or less 25 drug studies, numerous patients, sleepless nights, not more than 30 readings and countless requirements, I got the pin without any failing marks. Nevertheless, it's more than enough to pay for everything. Thy self is still on this phase where everything is happening so fast-surreal-kind. All I can think of right now is how grateful I am for this achievement. Nothing compares these things because the hard work totally paid off. Although I kind of regret not doing that well while on the track and not getting those special awards I was praying for, it didn't matter anymore. Maybe God's telling me to push harder for the board exams. 3 days from now, I will be finally walking the aisle to have my graduation. 4 years = NURSING. Still can't believe it. T_____T

p.s.

Danica Armada, Fresh Graduate of Bachelor of Science in Nursing. (Man, that sound's awesome!!!)

xo, readysetdrool.

Ideas.

There's no more room to wait for something that ain't coming back. No more reasons to wait because it's over. Months ago. Stop pushing yourself to believe what isn't gonna happen again. Just stop. 
xo, readysetdrool.

Rant 101

is this the price i have to pay for the love of keeping photographs and good music? the memories will always stay. fucking blackberry. you are the dumbest smartphone ever created. still can't get over the unfortunate death of my files. i mean there are tons of photos that weren't uploaded yet. heaps of good music i can't go on a day without. sucks. it felt like my heart was crushed into a million pieces. fml fml D:
xo, readysetdrool.

Valentine's day 2013

February 13, 2013 Welcoming Valentine's Day @ The Lab with le boys of my life. Tonio, Remie, Mikee Kevin, Shimca, Cindy, Gerone, Kuya Miko Kuya Da and Kuya Kevin! Thank you for the awesome night and for trying to punch, throw your shoes, slap, and whatever you're trying to do just cause you won't let me go home. Sorry for leaving early tho. Shitting bricks. 

Silly

Suddenly remembered someone asking me, WHY ME? I should've answered, "WHY NOT?". random.
xo, readysetdrool.

convo

Inside Mara's car...

Raul: Ba't para siyang lalake? Tinuturo yung dumaan na kaibigan namin.
Andie: Di siya lalake, may pagka boyish lang.
Ako: Eh kung boyish siya, ano ako?

SYNCHRONIZED ANSWER: BAKLA!!!!!!!!!!

hoshit. seems legit.
xo, readysetdrool.

friends

sometimes i feel blessed for having these bastards in my life. nothing matters when i'm with them. one of few things i will definitely miss about college - drinking with classmates because we just feel like doing it or maybe we're STRESSED. whichever.  

xo, readysetdrool.

Truth is....

2 months more. I'm almost there. A few more sacrifices and it'll be over soon. Please don't let go. Not yet.
xo, readysetdrool.

Thoughts.

A beautiful entry from Thought Catalog. I think it's unnecessary to dwell so much in the past where uncertainty and no assurances lies. It's actually painful but ridiculously very much applicable to my situation right now. Forgetting is not an escape but rather a truth that some things aren't always for you.

I don’t want to be this person. No one does. No one wants to admit that they are unable to move past something which happened so long ago that not even the most hopeless romantic would justify it. I know when I’m being pathetic, and letting something eat me from inside like a rotten tooth, and I don’t like it any more than I’m sure other people like to be around it. I can feel that I walk into a room and, when I hear you might be coming later on, suck the energy out of it completely. I know that people are holding their breath, waiting for me to make a scene. I know that everyone thinks I should have gotten over it. I hate being her, but she’s who I am. 

Part of me wants to ask you to let me go, even though I know how ridiculous that is. If I really think about it, I understand that you are not intentionally stringing me along or periodically giving me false hope for something we might have in the future. You’re no longer a part of my life, and you don’t even acknowledge me. As much as it pains me to admit, you likely don’t think about me. Your days probably turn into months without ever fondly looking back on the time we spent all day walking through the woods, watching the leaves turn and holding hands with our fingers laced. Those memories don’t exist for you — or, at least, not in a way you have to acknowledge. You can store them away for a rainy day when you want to think about something sweet and forgotten. I have to live with these memories, constantly nipping at my ankles and reminding me that they are everywhere I go. 

I know that it’s not your fault. But I want to let go. I want to walk away from what we had and make every day a conscious step towards something more positive, something where I don’t factor someone into my life who no longer cares about me. I want to be brave in a way I always used to be, but haven’t been for some time. I want to return to the me who laughs at jokes the loudest and is always up to try something new. I miss her, and at times have almost forgotten who she is. Part of me believes that the moment I truly let you go will be the moment I get her back — that you are, in a way, crowding my life and preventing me from living fully. But I know that it’s not a step you can take for me. 

I love you more now than I ever did, I think. And I know that part of this must be because I cannot have you, and things are always heightened with desire and longing. But I don’t know how to pretend that I don’t still burn for you the way I did when I was allowed to express it, if not more intensely. 

Please know that I’ll stop reaching out. I’ll stop making a fool of myself. I’ll stop being this person that I never wanted to be. I am working every day on making my life something beautiful and fresh and interesting, something that has nothing to do with you. And I hold nothing against you — even if I wish I could, even if that would make everything so much easier — but I know I can’t be around you. I’m working up the courage to phase you out of my life (and my mind) completely, so that one day you can enter and leave as any other pleasant acquaintance might. Because I’d love to just run into you in a grocery store one day and have a nice little chat about what we’ve been up to, then go about my day as if nothing happened. But right now, I know that I couldn’t. I know that seeing you unexpectedly would destroy me. One day, I will get there, though. I’ll be me again, and I’ll have forgotten this brief interlude of sorrow. I hope you meet me when I’m that person, so you can forget who I am today. 

xo, readysetdrool.

Chill 101

Last night was a total bad ass. Lol kidding. Spent another Saturday night with the awesomest people in the world. The staff~ holysmokes. Although I had fun, somehow I felt really bad because he was there and was totally avoiding me. IDK anymore. Totally not my problem anymore! :S
xo, readysetdrool.

2012 Monthy Highlights

Happy New Year everyone!!! 여러분 새해 복 많이 받으세요!!!!

Today marks the 1st page of 2013. This will be my year. Keeping it all optimistic because I 

want to define luck and blessings in 2013! 13 is my other lucky number other than 21, so yeah. Pretty much explains it all. Let's pwn 2013 everyone!! 

So what have you done last year? Frustrations? Happiness? Excitement? Well my year was more of like a roller coaster ride. But most of the time I felt like I was blessed by God. So here's some of the monthly highlights of my 2012.

Quote

"WORDS merely explain, but they don't say anything.

The HEART comprehends but it's always the brain that dictates."

xo, readysetdrool.

shizz

Salig Lang.

why do i always end up being tagged as the "bridge", the "supporter", the "friendzoned friend". It's not funny anymore. People actually think I'm always fine with this but it's not really fine. Gahhh. Few times when I really get affected about people's relationship statuses because I had something to do with it. The worst part of the story is that I always like a guy that fast. He may not be the perfect guy to date, but I always end up liking him. Hahah stupid. Random. 
xo, readysetdrool.

ties